erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
