dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
