so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
