so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
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