Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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