Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
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