I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
