My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize
