Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
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