Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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