No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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