thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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