Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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