i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize