he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
