btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
