My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
