using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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