You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
