my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
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