I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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