week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize