Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize