people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
