so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
