Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Randomize