just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
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