just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize