WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
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