she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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