he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
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