Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
