Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
