I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Randomize
