I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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