so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
