He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Randomize
