I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize