we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
