I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
