Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
