can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
