Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
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