The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
