If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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