We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
