I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
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