make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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