im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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