to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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