I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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